Enjoying 9 Beet Stretch and its spacious-density of colors, I thought I’d try my own hand with the software PaulStretch, by Nasca Octavian Paul. This little app (originally available in Win and Unix flavors) allows stretching of audio over time, minimizing “digital artifacts” from the process. Bullet-time for music, if you will.

I applied stretch to various contemporary works to hear the effect, discover new textures, and test time. I’ve pulled select elements from full render to give you a taste. Listen as if you both know and don’t know the original source.

For me, one of the lessons here is that there’s lots of interesting aspects to be found in subtlety; be it music, dance, art, science, humanity, etc. Read between the lines once in a while. Discussion and feedback welcome. Much more I could say on what’s happening here, and I might in the future, but just going to let the music play for a bit…

Layoff, Day 137. I approach the ides of July with LA temperatures rising, along with my real level of anxiety. I’m not sure if I’m in the Inferno or Purgatorio, but any sense of internal or external Paradiso would seem to be absent at this point.

A colleague that was attempting to do some well-meaning networking on my behalf, forwarded the email response from his contact:

“BTW, I spoke to a couple of people I know regarding your friend’s job situation and THERE ARE NO JOBS!”

Thanks, Dante. Divine comedy, indeed.

In my job search, one of the tools I’m utilizing is Yahoo Hot Job’s automated search results. With it, I receive a daily email listing new job posting results based on my prescribed job search terms and locale. You can have any number of these automated searches running, based on your own personal search terms.

One of my searches uses the terms “creative technology.” I was doing a quick scan down the list of daily finds on “creative technology” in the LA metro area when this job title and brief caught my eye:

Project Manager, Clinical R&D – Minimally Invasive Cardiac Surgery

…Heck, I think I’ll apply.

]]> http://girlordog.org/?feed=rss2&p=534 0 http://girlordog.org/?p=529 http://girlordog.org/?p=529#comments Sun, 11 Apr 2010 07:21:21 +0000 bp http://girlordog.org/?p=529

I recently signed up to volunteer at a German Shepherd Rescue, here in the LA area, hoping to do some good,  get a little perspective, and keep myself among society in wake of my layoff from employment. Maybe figure out if a dog is right for me. Or a girl.

As far as accompanying prose, this picture and post title pretty much speaks for itself, and in volumes. A little double entendre here..maybe even triple or quadruple. If you have some idea about this blog’s roots and my current micro-world happs, this can be taken just about any way and length one could…and with milage to spare.

Beyond the fact that most of the general economic political rhetoric used to scare folks about recent reform is identical to the discourse around every major move toward equity in the 20th Century, it is worth noting that the racist echoes, too, have a clear genealogy.  Class anxiety can be very usefully channelled into racial anxiety when momentum for the reform of the wealthy becomes too great to ignore. If poor Whites can be made to feel the the threat of the “racial other” in the midst of financial insecurity, the legitimate anger can be successfully redirected at an illegitimate target. Take for instance the following editorial from a Jackson, MS newspaper in opposition to Roosevelt’s New Deal in 1935:

“The average Mississippian can not imagine himself chipping in to pay for the pensions of able-bodied Negroes to sit around in idleness on front galleries while cotton and corn crops are crying for workers”

In other words, Social Security will be a transfer of wealth not from the haves to the have nots, but from White to Black. By successfully reframing the issue into a racial one, many of the policies greatest natural allies become its most hostile opponents. Two examples of very recent invocations of exactly the same kind of rhetorical misdirection:

“Reparations by way of health care reform?

Still believe in post-racial politics? Read the health care bill. It’s affirmative action on steroids, deciding everything from who becomes a doctor to who gets treatment on the basis of skin color. President Obama is on the record as being officially opposed to reparations for slavery. But as with other issues, you have to sift through his eloquent rhetoric and go beyond the teleprompter to get at what he really means.” -FoxNation Online July, 2009

And this from Rush Limbaugh:

“As the economy performs worse than expected, the deficit for the 2010 budget year beginning in October will worsen by $87 billion to $1.3 trillion. The deterioration reflects lower tax revenues and higher costs for bank failures, unemployment benefits and food stamps. But in the Oval Office of the White House none of this is a problem. This is the objective. The objective is unemployment. The objective is more food stamp benefits. The objective is more unemployment benefits. The objective is an expanding welfare state. And the objective is to take the nation’s wealth and return to it to the nation’s quote, “rightful owners.” Think reparations. Think forced reparations here if you want to understand what actually is going on.” – Rush Limbaugh’s Radio Program – May 2009

The relative poverty, the extreme inequality of wealth and income -and lack of opportunity for poor Whites in the Southeastern United States demonstrate clearly  the impact of this kind of false consciousness.  The acceptance of this way of seeing change is not just bad for people of color, it’s been devastating for poor Whites, too.

I’ve had a handle on this living in the “past” thing, and I seem to have acquired a better perspective with living for the “present” over the past year.  Now if I can just have a better idea of what living in the future might be…

Anyway. Achtung, baby.

Thoughts and observations from my night-shift experience:

1. Nightshift is not condusive to career advancement. I’ve only been here for 8 months (before I got “furloughed”), but I feel slightly stunted. Most of the execs are long since cashed out when I clock in to start my day. You are not around for those impropmtu meetings. Even among the peer level, you miss out on social events during work (lunches, after work outings, etc). You just need face time with people and night shift doesn’t allow that luxury as such during the day.

2. You don’t have a social life, or one that is severely crippled. Your friends, significant-other, and family don’t see you until the weekends, and even then, you are sleeping until at least noon. You can’t have dinner or after work-social with these people.

3. There’s not much happening in LA as I thought there might be, all hours of the night. The only food joints open are the sporadic greasy spoons. Even the ubiquitous traffic dies down at night. I had a 7 mile 20 minute commute going (at 530pm), and an 11 minute return commute.  I can often count the number of cars I see on the highway, coming home at 3:30am.

4. In reference to the aforementioned, don’t stay at work too late, other wise you will get caught in morning rush hour.

5. Your work colleagues become your social network. This is both good and bad. Good, because you see these people everyday. Bad, because you see these people everyday.

6. One of the bright-sides to working at night is that you do get the option be out-and-about during the daylight. And oh-what daylight it is, here in sunny Los Angeles. However, please see

7. Another plus to being a night-sider is the ability to experience lower traffic and human flow, when doing basic chores such as shopping.

Regardless of any positives, I’d really prefer not to work night shift.

Leaving aside for a moment the fact that intergenerational linguistic assimilation is faster for the present wave of Spanish-speaking immigrants than for any large group of immigrants in U.S. history AND the fact that this country has NO national language, this sticker got me thinking. U.S. history is full of fears about Chinese, Irish, Italian, German, Slavic immigrants and their allegedly inferior character and slowness of assimilation.

There was great paranoia, for instance, in Cincinnati in the middle of the 19th century that the Germans were not speaking English and that the immigrants would “take over” the city. When immigrants come into a nation- into a community- they most often occupy the lowest strata in the labor market. It turns out that no matter which racial group (however contemporaneously defined) is represented, these poor immigrants are always believed to be violent, lazy, highly sexualized, unintelligent, and generally immoral. This way of understanding immigrant groups — and perhaps more importantly their lifestyle and life chances — makes their exploitation and subjugation all the easier to explain and tolerate. The ways in which today’s immigration “debate” is framed include plenty of these old and deeply troubling stereotypes.

My last thought on this for today: I wonder if the chain-smoking guy in the rebel flag hat that occupied this car considered that “America” is a hemisphere, not a country- and that the majority of the folk who inhabit this half of the world speak a language that is presumably not his own. Irony much?

And so I begin day two of my unemployment journey in the California Republic. One of my first steps at finding somewhat a locus of control on myself and situation has been to contact the State of California Emplopyment Development Department, in hopes of filing for some sort of unemployment insurance payments, until I secure regular employment again. Monday I racked up 86 call attempts, shut down in the phone cue, hung up automatically on because of number of callers. The system is too overloaded to even place callers in a cue. The irony of this, of course, costs this heavily in debt state even more pain to the tune of billions of dollars for just the failed calls.

1.800.300.5616

Today, I rose at 7:55am to being calling a toll free number for EDD’s 8:00am opening bell. Callers will hear one of two basic messages. One with a light-tonal female voice, telling you straight up that “…due to the call volume, we are unable to take your call at this time.” She then launches into a special note about the Obama legislation and stimulus money. This is the voice you don’t want to hear, as it is the voice of no hope, despite the promise of “extended benefits due to the Obama legislation.” At this point, you should immediately hang up, redial, and hope to get the second voice, otherwise you will be hung up on at the end of this public service announcement.

The second voice is a darker female voice that launches into an actual phone tree process, giving you options to press, based on your previous employment status, such as veteran clasification, federal/state employee classification, or previous states worked in the past 18 months (which is why I was unable to utilize the online option, and needed to make the call in the first place).

At this point, it may behoove you to have memorized your particular touch tones, and enter them rapidly as possible after hearing her come on the line, in order to maximize your time and attempts at getting through. I found there is no need to pause for each segment’s message playback. As long as you don’t “slur” the tones, just press away…

After you enter your codes, you still face the potential for a similar “too many, thanks for playing” or you will get the golden ticket to a true wait time, placing you in a cue to talk to an operator.

Around 8:04am, I actually did get through, but was so excited, I hung up. So, for the next 41 minutes, I racked up another 121 call attempts. On the 122 call attempt, at 8:45am, I had a blessing of success, made it through the fray, and was placed into the cue.

After a 17 minute elatively painless call and a hearty, yet direct grandfatherly “good luck!” from my operator, I was assured that I was all registered, and my assistance would be on its way in the next couple of weeks.  As my fortune cookie said, what a most delightful journey! Interesting times, indeed.

Granted,  I’ve only attended some of the more headlining movies, so my sample size is small and narrow. However, in my years of attending movies, I can only count on about two or three fingers the number of times I’ve heard noise from an audience in the midwest, save for the midnight geek fest showings: Dark Knight, Rocky III, Top Gun, Matrix, Star Wars.

Is this because I’m in the Hollywood, the land where movies and stardust is born from? And somehow it settles on the localized population, causeing such outbursts? Is it because a notable count of the populous is involved directly or indirectly in the entertainment industry? Does this happen elsewhere, and on a regular basis?

I’ll continue to collect data and monitor the situation.

I’ve long been fond of the NYT special edition on “How Class Works”- and there are some data there that speak to some of the above mentioned concern. Namely, when one follows the link below, then to the “A Nationwide Poll” tab, then to the “What it takes to get ahead..” link on the left, something interesting is revealed.

How Class Works

While the value of education and hard work seems to be fairly evenly distributed across income categories, those making over $150,000 a year are the least likely to agree that intergenerational wealth transmission or social connections have any impact on how one gets ahead in life. Also, They are the most likely to attribute success to “Natural Ability”. To be direct, for the rich, it is not who they know or who their parents were, but it is all about their own talent and hard work. The strength of this kind of attribution of the reasons for success seem to be particularly strong for the wealthy.

While we do not have (quickly accessible) corresponding data for suppositions about how or why one does poorly, we can imagine similar patterns of attribution. Those with power and privilege see primarily individual agency as the reason for life chances much more than others. While this is what one familiar with research of stratification and inequality might expect, these data make the case pretty clearly- and in plain- as they say- black and white. Taken alone these data might just be the odd curiosity of a Sociologist, but when we take into account what we also know about where wealth really comes from- namely that most wealth in the world is still inherited rather than earned, and that access to social networks of power and prestige are still at least as important as formal education in gaining opportunity and wealth, one is left with a very interesting picture of the wealthy in the US. Interesting, indeed.

Hang on, as this ride will be quick and wicked as I get up to speed. This waxing will also be shot from the hip, and unabashedly less poetic than perhaps I prefer it to be.

About six months ago, I left Indiana and moved to LA for a change in career; moreso, I did this for a change in life and scenery. The job I had in Indiana was pretty good. The work, the environment, the cash, the benefits. Some good people. All great things. However, I wanted to taste life a little differently than I had been. So I took a risk and left it behind. A leap. And during a tremendous national economic strife.

Get busy livin, or get busy dyin.

Well, more of a calculated gamble. I was fortunate to have a good job lined up. That being said, I knew there were risks, as the new gig was clearly fraught with its own perils of chance and being impacted by the recession. However, the move west happened, and life was an adventure. Much good new life, and reflection on experience past.

And then winter happened (a crazy thing for a midwestern volk to experience, their first “winter” season in southern California). Mid January, one of our clients dropped. Such is business, and such is the entertainment/TV industry. Our workload slacked (particularly mine since I directly handle work from this account). Panic stunk the air, like burned out electronics; not sure where it is burning or what it is burning, but you know it is just not good. Danger of shakeup in the company.

Yet a week and a half went by. I felt the smell was dissipating. By Friday, I was feeling good about myself and my job. I felt I had come a long way, physically, but moreso mentally with this job. I was getting better and faster in my work. I was finding points where I could focus on the creative, rather simply on execution. I felt a sense gaining my sea legs and enjoying the voyage.

On that Friday night at work,  the Friday before my birthday, there was a knock at my suite door. The person that entered was not whom normally visits me two hours into my shift. In fact, he should have gone home two hours ago. The EBS Attention Tone was going off in my head.

Flash Action Message: This was not good. He shouldn’t be here. Wrong door, I pleaded. I knew why he was there.

That Friday evening, January 29th, 2010, I was notified that “at the end of February sweeps“, because of the drop in workload, I would be laid off, and out of a job. Future employment unknown.

My emotional being at that immediate point of receiving this visitor and his message was pretty even keel, almost jovial as I was getting the news. You would have thought he offered to wash my car. In the ensuing week, however, my emotional being has run the gamut of emotions and thoughts. Sadness, disappointment in self and company. Frustration (with self and company), anger, relief, excitement. Possibilities. A sense of exile and ostracization. Self doubt. Despair. Freak out. Emotional insecurity. Numb.

At this point, now a week + removed from the episode, I’m still collecting info as the thoughts of my employer and my options as to this exit. And what my next action and direction is. I”m sadly not feeling much love lost, but I guess that’s another lesson nota bene.

I’m trying to ask myself those tough questions about what I want to do with my life. And what I don’t want to do. And how execute on such answers. You know, meaning of life sort of things….the easy questions.

At the risk of humor being confused with bitterness, I didn’t really plan on this happening.While I’m in better near-term shape than many folk that also face unemployment, some days really are pretty dark feeling for me, here in the land of sunshine. I have about 3 months of finance before panic, def con 1, and total release are in play. Even though I’ve got a large challenge externally, I feel like I am my worst threat, internally (see listing of emotions, above).

I have no idea what’s next. I have no idea what I’m “going to do.” Hm. Yeah, that “freak out” thing…

I had planned to continue blogging during my transition west, and during my initial observations to my “new life” in Los Angeles. The people, the culture, the places, the environment, the lifestyle, etc. However, life and time happened since August. Some really great elements were seen and experienced (and continue to be) that I really wanted to record my own personal realizations, as someone from the midwest America living in a “different country”,  simply for myself to look back on my initial impressions of life in a point in time.  But I really couldn’t figure out a proper place to surface, and pick up with a comment or two.  I had too much to say and too much time seemingly had passed. Where would be the next demarkation point in my life and adventure here, in where I could speak?

Hm. Well, I think this is as a good a chapter marker as any.

New Life in California, Chapter II.

Photo Chris Bergin, The Star Press (Muncie, IN)

Perhaps not, but I am hopeful.

The fact is- as the diagram above represents- that in-group variation is often greater than between group variation. Put another way, two members of the same group (Category A) might be more different from one another than any two members of different groups (a person from Category A and one from Category B).  To use a practical example, two randomly sampled pizza delivery guys are just as likely to be different from one another as they are to be similar- in many, many ways.

This post is meant to serve as a reminder, not least to myself, to question my own assumptions about the groups and categories of people that I encounter and study.

Robertson, and I suspect millions for whom he is a guiding light, has a hard time explaining how it was that people of African and Native American descent threw off the chains of imperialism so long ago without the help of a some supernatural force.  Yes, long before much of the rest of the hemisphere had emerged from colonization and subjugation, proud group of people of color- led by revolutionary Toussaint L’ouverture- crushed  the mighty French empire. So invested is Robertson in his own whiteness, that he cannot imagine a situation in which black folks might get the better of white folks without the help of the Devil. Robertson’s quirky theory is not just about his usual God-on-our-side attribution of disaster (see his comments about 9/11 and Katrina)- this time it is a clear representation of his racial politics.

This vision of the Haitian people and their history also absolves people of European descent- especially those from the United States- of any complicity in the degradation and overwhelming poverty suffered by the Haitian people for so long. No market reforms, no amount of economic or humanitarian aid will make a difference- these people are cursed and doomed to their fate. This kind of supernatural attribution, then, serves both to rob black folks of their agency and proud history of resistance while obscuring the role of the rest of the world in creating a situation in which Haitians (even without natural disasters) live and have lived for so long.

As with any comment like this one, it is not so shocking that an individual holds such a worldview. What warrants attention is that Robertson’s choice to publicly endorse such a position suggests that there are millions who share this way of seeing the world. And that, not unlike the earthquake that destroyed thousands of human lives, is a true disaster.

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